Monthly Archives: December 2016

New year!

No more studying in 2016. Soon there´s only future ahead. The time is ticking and I guess all over the world big cities are crowded with expectant inhabitants. Yes the next year should be filled with new possibilities and fresh starts.

New gadgets are presented in an ever increasing rate to help us save the world. Guess there has been a new threshold of purchases for Christmas gifts, again. New, more environmentally friendly cars are presented with various spices for making great deals that includes trashing the old car. Good for resource consumption footprints. The development for lasers has peaked in a rate than ever before to help us trash enemy air craft in seconds.

New promising economic developments that rings well with the possibility to consume ourselves into the life (we) so badly want is set to bring the Overshoot date even earlier to 2017. Our overcrowded cities will bring new possibilities for environmental progress for the global majority. Yes, everyone will cultivate their own food at the balcony while international companies are purchasing rights for ownership over everything that grows.

Yeah each new year with new promises feels very ensuring. It´s so good we have come into this development of righteousness for all living things making us so environmentally friendly. Buying plant based food from all over the world to the sound of increased deforestation or ethanol produced instead of needed staple foods in poor countries, while harassing our domestic farmers´ meat production when the real problem is slaughter. Green promises sometimes feel, well, so green.

Yes, I guess people will be even more environmentally friendly next year while cutting prices/environmental-steps during productions stages. So that we can reach the circular society in 2017.

So what are you going to add to the world in 2017 beyond your word? Here you have words. See where they lead. Tnx Bethesda for wise words instead of short promises! Viewer discretion is advised!

Happy new year!


Now the Christmas has reached its end and it´s time to sleep. Still lots to be done. Today I went to my other accommodation and stuffed down my stuff in boxes. It´s good to finally be rid of the room this coming week. I can just be thankful the whole thing coincided with the internship accommodation. One thing leads to another guess.

The coming week will be rather irregular with various errands alongside the internship. So far I´ve not figured out how about the “when”, but I plan to have that fixed a.s.a.p. After that I hopefully have another accommodation waiting for me and can only hope things works out during the last part of the ride. The only thing bothering me is to make that freaking deadline. Grrrrr. No preassure! School system of today^^

Very few persons within the academic world seem to care about quality, only deadlines. The school, in this case the adult childcare centre, is no exception since it´s highly tied to academic conduct. Still authorities carve the results in stone when the short-run results comes spitting out of the process. Doing long and planned runs – no one is really trained for. Believe me – I try but as so many other slow students thinking about quality, I get punished^^ Haha. Think about it for a sec! I do.

One often takes for granted that being behind schedule is a bad thing. Often poor achievement. I guess it´s true. But why is the system so keen of promoting poor, time constrained conducts that not seldom get criticized for being too short or simple conducts, for producing thought through generated data?

Just a though.


Hi again!

The Christmas holiday is still rolling. Well, right now most people are asleep though, but still one more day. That means more sleep over hehe! Yeah, the gift trading day came and went as planned. I couldn´t see anything out of the ordinary on the news anyhow. I although invited the twins for the annual hour of Christmas cartoon clips at TV in my room and was surprised that neither France nor Luxemburg had this piece of beauty. Hehe guess it goes for others as well. Still sit there fixed following the same Disney classics as usual:)

When considering my family home at my mothers’ I’ve really been fortunate during Christmas, since there has been some kind of magic about it. Can´t say I´ve been that happy about situations all the time otherwise, but Christmas was always the day when things just seemed to work. Enchanted nights in the cozy living room illuminated by the lamps in the tree, creating shadows of warmth and color around people.

Spending Christmas alone as I tend to do come rather easy for me. With a quite reduced buffet I spent the evening watching Starcraft matches online and ended with some episodes of Sunes Jul. Hilarious:) The second thing I mean, the first is more awsome^^

Although, Christmas is a tough time for many people. One should not forget that many tend to cry themselves to sleep in loneliness, sobbing over the food. Others tend to have this glorious time for reflection destroyed by alcohol, that beside being rather annoying can drive people out of their homes. Not everyone has as easy calebrating alone as me, for example. I understand their pain but would recommend those to rather take use this occasion instead.

Yeah, Christmas tend to mean very different things for people. When celebrating with others I can just recommend blending the alcohol with the fire wood, there it has a more constructive use. That tend to solve many problems – I´ve heard.

So – about the formalities! The internship is nearing its end, manifested by questions from my supervisor about final reports concerning my internship. Someone seems to be reminded about the fact that now others are about to get insight about my time here^^. Yeah it´s a relief to go on! I can say that right away.

Concerning the thesis that has been greatly suffering from the nature of the internship has got another course correction again. There´s no time to get into the field of slaughter with, well so little time. So with a rather serious deadline coming up I don´t have much choice than changing game field… again. I´m going back to laser! Not really what I had in mind and it´s not the smoothest way of approaching these issues for me. I´ve been pondering this option during Christmas and feel I haven’t much choice.

One begins to wonder if there is some kind of meaning for certain things to happen:) Or is that connection more up to the ability to make use of the situations, one person from another. Well I can only hope there´s some reason. There are after all many persons that needs to be represented and one day hopefully helped. If I could get what I wanted out of it I would get class 2 under license demand as well.

I´ve not decided what to dive into; principle of caution; scrutinizing current standing models of danger assessments; getting more selections of data into scientific manageable game fields etc. What I know is that I´ve at least a fair chance to send some basic research proposal for the deadline. With or without a supervisor^^

By the way, have you heard that Chris Metzen quit? Feel a bit sad about it since he brought me so much joy during many years.


Dreaming progress

Hi again!

A new week and spent the last days a bit ill. Managed to get the thesis proposal into motion though. Some headlines with a pasted description from the how to do papers so far, but hey it´s progress.

I´ve also continued looking for accommodations. Was visiting one potential house in the outskirts of Uppsala yesterday. Rather worn down still from this cold that just won´t let me go. No cigarettes, room on the second floor, toilet far away from the landlord’s bed. Seems as a decent guy. A bit restraining towards the contract thing though. Make one wonder. It seems as a good place but it´s always exhausting trying to map what´s the deal with situations and feel so dependent on things to work all the time. I said yes anyhow and hope the door is opening when one arrive in a near future. Nice with a parental home to resettle in, but just have to push on the old fashion way.

Now the administration of the internship course went active again and I got a message reminding me that things are almost over. To my great delight I saw that I´m supposed to write an about 7 pages evaluation. Feels nice to handle alongside my proposal and internship. Yey!

Between the hours of half genuinely searching for articles I dreamt away on YouTube with some more clips. Fiction and facts alike. I like films and have until the adult child care centre followed best possible my favorite crews in USA of which I´m most fond of collaborators of James Cameron. I was reminded that it´s now 30 years since the launch of Aliens – one of my top 10. Can you believe it! 30 years and still has 8,6 at IMDB last I checked a year ago or something. I remember when I was about 15 and saw one of the Queen prototypes in real scale with my own eyes! Was reaching her knee with my head. That was a day of days I can tell you! Woooow. I remember her towering up over me in that exhibition tent outside the shopping mall. Regrettably, poor as my struggling mother was we had no money for a camera, but can still dream on the moment 15 years later:)

Here´s a link to a quick 30 year reunion interview with the core of cast and crew 30 years later reunion, including Cameron. Ah, one´s really reminded about how much I need to dream to focus onto the reality^^ Scope of Romantics I guess!

Just found some energy to read through some articles I found earlier today.



About the thesis I after many doubts just think about following the research proposal guidelines, to get things going. Just wait with the freaking core of the thing and let it come to me. I mean, I´ve been stuck wondering how other people want me to write and having the disposition. So I just think like – ah h#ll with it! Just start up some Word doc and begin writing down some crap. Much of these things I´ve realized during my years at the adult childcare center are psychological. If one can´t patter thinks like most.. we dreamers have to… well just begin.

So with that decision made I believe I´m gonna frame some kind of reply forms about some really “important” stuff to various stakeholders and then I´m gonna be the star student of the year or something. You know – progress, not perfection^^

Feel so tired from wandering. Now it´s time to just do something. Anything:P Right now it feels as a good choice. Guess things will turn out okay after someone just correct what I haven’t “pattered” the right way or whatever. As I said to the course leader after 6 years of this “I don´t understand a word they are pattering about”, concerning this strict academic frames, that I don´t think there´s more to it than that people trained as guinea pigs don´t know how to handle free thinking individuals when met with wider mindset and other ways “of doing it” than their own, they just short-circuit.

For years one has competed on other persons terms and it feel so good that I´m finally arriving to the last step here. If continuing to doc. it´s all about framing and pattering. Knowledge or even more so… wisdom.. almost leaves the focus from that point. Henceforth one can begin to use whatever I´m made off and apply it in somewhat own terms as advisor or something, that I´m aiming for. Make the knowledge thing and just throw these models and analyze “frames” to ¤#%¤#&%¤#.

Ah. Yes, that was nice to get off my chest. Not bad actually. To get half way through the master level, still the same retard in math as I were in the elementary school, I´ve must have made something right along my road^^ Clearly I´ve built my knowledge on other kinds of patterns than others.


Interns and volunteers


New weekend and this time I´ve promised myself I shall.. take the time to close the “to do” gap of paper exercises. It´s one month to deadline now for the research proposal. Wow. The time is ticking. The thought of just little more than 2 weeks at the internship left, awakens some hidden energy! 🙂 This has been a though time I can say and to finally see the light in the other side of the tunnel is such a relief.

I also got this typical phone call here the other day tightening the noose again – I´m released from my other accommodation one month earlier than expected^^ Oh oooh! So things feel a bit windy just now. Lots of stuff happening and one really needs to keep the calm. I mean if one had this ordinary family home that most do – I guess things wouldn´t matter, but all of us hasn´t been that fortunate during our lives. No you read right – not even in the fantastic Sweden, ho ho ho^^

So with relatively… sigh… little time left here at the farm thoughts of course goes towards those that have been here besides me, which I decided to write some lines about.

Besides me there are firstly two girls around their twenties. One is from France Audrey – and is therefore more known, with a little… help from me, as Viva la France^^ or the Impaler! But that´s another story. Kind of a social chameleon:) Here the other day she came dragging with the lid of a big animal feed container on her back – pretending to be a hermit crab^^ Hehe. When she saw a rat stealing food she snatched if over the neck. Stuck! Swoosh! Predator style with the wrist blades around the neck! ^^

The other girl – Suria – is from Luxemburg and is from her little more careful behavior more known as Pocahontas. They are kind ‘a sharing everything, Where one is, so is the other. Thereby the “Twins”^^ Kind of though both of them actually. Before we got the hot water in our house they showered cold for weeks.

Besides from us there are many that come and go – mostly more experienced that the farmers take use from when needed. My favorite was Antoine, also from France – a real badass at farming – studying at a counterpart of SLU, in France. He´s regrettably long gone now but his memory and the stunts still lingers on. The twins have lots of contact with him on Facebook. I´ve also heard some rumors that he might show up during Christmas:D

Well just some thoughts about my personal environment for now!

Another Saturday

Saturday again and sitting at Geo Centrum in Uppsala once again. In the Sustainable Development´s (almost) own library by the way. I´m seeing some other students passing outside the glass door in their own endeavors. Otherwise I´m almost alone here.

A good Saturday in other words. Just trying to warm up for my personal errands-Saturday.

I´ve been giving the thesis some more thought, but to be honest the internship is almost killing me. I´m really glad it´s only three weeks left, plus two days. Wow incredible how much energy that´s going into that right now. Meanwhile I´m bleeding energy over the thesis. I´ve at least found a plausible supervisor. Just wondering whether the guy has any time for me^^

Well, not much that´s changed in other words:P Just trying to survive this internship some more weeks.

That´s all for now!

Tnx for reading!


Weekend and I´m in one of the computer halls at the Geo center for the first time in months:) I´m trying to get the thesis thing going. Last week I met with the thesis supervisor and some things got a bit clearer.

I guess it´s time to draw the first signs in the sand how to frame this thing:) Hehe like in the morning: one three! Well in any case it’s nice to have some change of environment. Now it’s one month to go at the internship and I can say it feels so good to see the end in the same calendar sheet!

It has been a very intensive period in many ways and I hope it has been worth all the trouble. I´ve learned so much about universal good and bad in the world. Anyhow it´s December and one can tell inhabitants in Uppsala has lots of anticipation about Christmas.

I wonder although if it’s time to leave Uppsala by the beginning of the thesis for another, less crowded city. Still within Mälardalen Valley though! My home town Västerås could be a good choice, since it lying in the center of the region. It´s fairly close to both relatively big AND small cities all around. I haven´t decided though.

Well that´s the plan for folks!